Sexuality Is A Matter Of Taste

Just your friendly gay man setting the record straight.

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Image: Christian Buehner on Unsplash

Being gay is not a choice, but it’s also not a concrete position either. You cannot actively change your sexuality like you can with clothes. And you cannot be irrevocably stained by “accidentally” sleeping with the same sex.

The best way to explain sexual orientation is with a food analogy. Everyone has food they don’t like. For me, it’s tomatoes. For you, it could be broccoli or brussels sprouts. And then you have foods that you’re okay with. You may not necessarily be over the moon about them, but they’re good. Think chips or lettuce. Lastly, you have foods that you love. Chocolate, rump steak, garlic.

Sexuality is exactly the same.

Most of you love the opposite sex. That’s a given since straight sex is the best route towards procreation (pun intended!). But a lot of you have dabbled in the same-sex, purely because you’re curious. But we can go deeper than this.

You might hate broccoli, but you might be okay with it in a vegetable stir-fry. I hate tomatoes, but I love them in spaghetti. In other words, your sexuality can change depending on the circumstances. I, myself, have tried girls in a few scenarios. But, just like I am with licorice, I can safely say that I’d probably never be with a woman again.

And that exclusivity is not as common as you think. In fact, while a majority of us are exclusively attracted to the opposite sex, many studies report that there’s a decent percentage who have had a same-sex attraction.

Australian women aged 22–28, for instance, have a 58.8% chance of being exclusively heterosexual, while 25.8% are “mostly” straight and 10.2% are bisexual. This means that over a third of young adult women will at least have some same-sex attraction.

The interesting thing to note is that most studies show women have a higher chance of being attracted to the same sex than men. Personally, I believe it’s due to the toxic masculinity that has permeated our societies for so long.

A lot of men see being gay as a weaker identity, and so they are less likely to identify or even say they might identify with same-sex attraction. But as I’ve noted, sexuality is simply about sex. It’s got nothing to do with masculinity or femininity.

So when it comes to exploring your sexuality, don’t be afraid to experiment. It’s as natural as eating food.

It’s just sex, really…

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Setting the record straight on sexuality and being your most authentic self.

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