How To Have Pleasurable Safe Sex

Don’t go penetrating willy-nilly!

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Image: Scott Sanker on Unsplash

While abstinence is the most effective way to protect yourself from STIs and unplanned pregnancy, it’s kinda hard when sex is so flipping amazing!

And yes, using a condom is the best method to prevent unwanted things, but sex is not just about finding the biological hole. There are other, much more stimulating ways to get yourself off.

Of course, not all of us like to use condoms when diving into certain orifices. So if you absolutely must go condomless, I recommend getting onto PrEP to at least protect yourself from HIV. It does not protect against other STIs, nor does it prevent unwanted pregnancy, but it’s immensely safer than penetrating willy-nilly.

Aside from that, here are some exceptionally pleasurable techniques you could use for your wild sexual escapades.

Work that mouth!

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Image: Gabriel Matula on Unsplash

The mouth is, scientifically, closely related to the inner linings of a vagina and an anus. Thankfully, the juices that are excreted in a mouth (that’s saliva, you naughty-minded reader!) do not carry most STIs — most especially HIV. Vaginal and anal fluid — and we cannot forget about spunk — do carry STI infections.

That being said, bodily juices are not the only way for STIs to be transmitted. Open sores, including those that resemble Chlamydia, Gonnorhea and Syphilis, are also culprits in the transmission of disease. So before you kneel down and accept your penance, make sure you don’t have any sores inside your mouth.

This is also a good time to check their jaunty organ for sores too.

Performing amazing oral requires a good deal of communication. In fact, great sex requires communication. Maybe the man you’re pleasing has a sensitive member, so it might be good to go a little slower and to retract those teeth. Maybe the lady you’re soon to tickle prefers a finger or two with that tongue of yours.

Every person is different. And the best way to understand them is to talk and listen. More emphasis on listen!

Master the use of your hands

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Image: Taras Chernus on Unsplash

Great sex involves the delicate use of hands. Whether you’re subtly telling them to roll over, tickling their ovaries or mastering your skill in stick shifting, hands are vital. And the chances of catching anything is zilch, provided your hands are free of abrasions.

Let’s start with men since they’re my sexual cup of tea. First, you must understand the difference between cut and uncut (or, more clinically, circumcision). Some uncut cocks won’t retract, and the ones that do can either be a tight squeeze or seamlessly loose. But all of them can feel pleasure if you know how to work them.

Uncut members also have the ability to make use of self-lubrication (seminal fluid or pre-cum if you will). If you work them right, they don’t need much lubrication.

Cut members require lube, regularly. You can spit in your hand or keep some actual lube nearby. The head of the penis is, obviously, the sensitive part. Be sure to tickle it from time to time. But a good handjob requires more than stroking. Some guys like their balls fondled, some guys like a belly rub, others like their nipples pinched, and there are a few who don’t mind a wet finger or two between the cheeks.

Now for the lady bits! Indeed, being a gay man myself, I think it would be rather uncouth for me to discuss the female g-spot. So I’ve found a wonderfully informative video on the clitoris and how to please it:

Of course, there is something I can say on the subject that will ultimately help you reach sexual nirvana: COMMUNICATION! The best person to ask about great sexual techniques is the person you’re playing with. They’ve fondled their bits way more than you have; they know all the good tricks. So I implore you to ask them.

Get adventurous!

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Image: Malvestida Magazine on Unsplash

Who says sex needs to be in a bedroom? Or that it must be monogamous? Or that inanimate objects should be set aside? People who suck at sex, that’s who!

There’s more to sex than just ploughing a hole. Sometimes it takes more than tickling the right spots. Thankfully, getting adventurous in the right way can be safe and immensely more pleasurable.

Bring some food into the sexual equation for a delicious treat. Whipped cream on the dangly bits works wonders! Or perhaps you should take adventure literally. Kitchen countertop, in the lounge room or even on the balcony. Heck, maybe fooling around at a friend’s house or in an unlit park at night.

And even consider introducing toys to your conquest. Not just phallic toys, but even fleshy orifices and vibrating jelly beans.

It’s your adventure!

Utilize your body parts

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Image: Hanna Postova on Unsplash

While the mouth and hands are the most important tools for any sexual conquest, it’s good to know there are other body parts you can use.

Ladies, why not use your feet to stroke his throbber? Or offer your mammaries as a suitable substitute? You could even rub lube between your thighs for a pleasurable faux insertion. It’ll be the safest sex you could have.

Men, why not rub your hairy forearms along her crevice or bring your stubbly chin into the downstairs make out session.

It’s even well noted that some areas of the body are sensitive to touch. I know countless men and women who advocate for neck kissing and caressing. Some squirm at the light brushing of the upper thigh. Hell, even grasping hands during intense foreplay makes for a grander spiritual awakening.

There’s a whole body there for you to explore. Find what makes it tick and you’re in for an orgasmic time.

Discover your kinks

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Image: Charles Deluvio on Unsplash

Kinks come in all shapes and sizes, and nearly all of them are relatively safe.

When it comes to kink, most people are immediately reminded of bondage, featuring whips, chains and well-constructed knotting. But bondage is a small section of the variety of kinks.

There’s an abundance of role-play scenarios, from daddies to stepsisters, and even the more quirky forms like pool boy and the policeman. There’s even puppy play where people dress up like dogs. Whatever tickles your fancy, I suppose!

Another is urophilia — colloquially known as golden showers or water sports. Peeing on someone is considered a way of marking one’s territory, so to speak. It could be great for those who love being dominated. I recommend doing it in the shower, though.

Voyeurism is another popular fetish where someone watches people have sex, as is exhibitionism. Together they make a wonderful pair!

Wax-play is another fun kink which involves dropping hot candlewax on bare skin. If it ain’t wax play, then surely it’s zapping.

Pleasurable safe sex requires a good deal of communication and a fun sense of adventure.

Don’t be afraid to dabble!

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Setting the record straight on sexuality and being your most authentic self.

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