How To Deal With Bullying

Here’s something they don’t teach you in school!

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Image: Timothy Eberly on Unsplash

I’m not going to teach you how to beat them up, because I’m such a passive homo. And personally, I’d implore you to reconsider that thought. They’re just not worth it.

Instead, I’m going to give you the tools to deal with whatever verbal assault is thrown your way. Whether it’s snarky nicknames, jarring comments or good old fashioned trolling, I’ve got the metaphorical weapons for you!

Own Your Identity

The most powerful thing you can do right now is to take ownership of your true identity. Be confident with who you are. It’s your body, it’s your mind and it’s your life. And if you’re not going to take ownership of it, then the bullies will.

The main reason bullies bully is because they want to dominate. Either because they’re struggling with their own self-worth or because they’re simply just arseholes. But, whatever their reason, a bully’s ultimate goal is to make you feel like shit. And if you do not accept yourself and own your identity, their words are going to hurt.

Don’t give them the satisfaction!

So, whether you’re gay, fat, too short, too tall, too unwhite, or even just too freaky, accept the shit out of yourself! It’s your identity. Own it, enjoy it, and know that there are people out there who accept you and quite possibly find you attractive because of it.

Own Your Labels

Many people will tell you to ignore derogatory remarks, many others will offer nice comebacks, and some will tell you to punch that bully in the face. But the only way words will never hurt is when you own them.

I used to hate getting called a faggot. It would rattle my bones! But now I use it as a term of endearment for myself and my close gay friends. It’s just another way of saying I’m gay, really. And now, when someone calls me a faggot, I can be like “Yep. Sure am. Would you like some pointers?”

Even the black community have taken nigger on for themselves. They own it. Of course, it’s still considered an offensive slur in many parts of the world, but it is just a man-made word in the end. It essentially derives from the Latin word niger, meaning the colour black.

Funnily enough, faggot doesn’t derive from any known homosexual word, and that’s because homosexuality wasn’t a term until the late 19th century.

Talk about late bloomers!

Indeed, the bullies who spew these words in derogatory ways don’t care much for their etymology. All they care about is hurting you and therefore dominating you. And if you bite or cry, they’ve won.

So don’t take the bait and don’t bathe in the feeling of being offended. Instead, accept the bully’s remarks with jest and move on.

And if whatever remark they say isn’t you, then what are you worried about? Laugh it off and move on!

Own Your Space

Whether it’s your space in real life or your space on the interwebs, you gotta guard it with a passion.

Bullies can easily be blocked on many platforms. And if you have to do it because they’re getting annoying, then do it. You don’t have to put up with it.

And this is especially true for trolls. The best way to stop a troll is to block and ignore. And if they are somehow able to keep at it, just keep replying with a thumbs-up emoji. They’ll get bored eventually.

Because once you start to bite, they will swing back like bozo the clown.

And this is also true in real-life. If someone at work is being a dick, don’t bite back. Try to send them the stock answer of “okay” and see how it goes. If they are persistent, raise it with someone who can help.

But ultimately, own the space around you. It’s your space, it’s your life. Don’t let anyone take down your walls without your permission.

Own Your Mind

Never, ever let your mind mull over what that bully says. It never says anything about you. All it says is that the bully is an arsehole and possibly needs some love.

Mulling over their words is what lands you in a hotbed of self-hatred, so don’t give their words another thought. Just accept them and move on.

You have so much more important things to think about in your life. Things like family and friends, work and hobbies, and the constant toying over your wild ideas.

They’re the things that really matter. Not what some bully says to you. All a bully cares about is hurting you, so don’t let them!

Beat the bully by owning yourself.

Written by

Setting the record straight on sexuality and being your most authentic self.

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